Podcasts

All Our Podcasts in Your Pocket!

Cornucopia Radio Podcast 1PODCAST 46: A pigeon race, as every fancier knows, begins with a basket. But with a hundred different finish lines, each one a backyard loft, when does a pigeon race end?  In 1913, Charlie Hudson entered one of his pigeons in a race from Rome to England. On the day of the big race a storm blew in and a thousand birds were swept away and never seen again. Apart from one…

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Performed By: Wayne Russell, Stephanie Lee, Katie Richmond-Ward, Dylan Carratt, Chris Bellamy, Ian Carter, Justin Scott, Mal Carratt, Sharon Brogden, Graham Marshall, Sinead Rankin, Tim Rutherford, Rex Davies, Zaff Malik, Michelle Michaels, Duncan Miller, Francesco Bonalume, Alex Davies and James Cottle.

Credits: Written by Anthony Atkin and Allison Glossop | Production Assistant: Alex Davies | Edited & Produced by Peter Beeston & Lianne Bacon.
Music: Featuring extracts from: ‘White in the Moon’ by Geert Veneklaas | ‘Jarná Polka’ and ‘Bayrische Polka’ by Brighouse & Rastrick Band | ‘The King of Rome’ by Doug Eunson & Sarah Matthews
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

True Colours PodcastPODCAST 46: Have you ever stopped and wondered about the colour of the things that surround you? For example, have you ever wondered why an orange is called an orange? Was it named after the colour, or was the colour named after the fruit?Chances are you might not consider the colour of the life that surrounds you as very important; but it wouldn’t take much to shift your reality around. It wouldn’t take much at all…

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Performed By: Mal Carrat, Kathleen Bulmer, Jason Turner, Tom Wilson, Nathan Beatty, Graham Marshall, Sinead Rankin, Peter Beeston, Olivia Steele, Rahul Kurup, Nick Draper, Tristan Brunsdon, Francesco Bonalume, James Larabee,  Kyle Richardson, Phil Mason, Jonathan Syer, Julia Harrigan, Happyspace and Alex Davies

Credits: Written by Mike Murphy | Edited & Produced by Peter Beeston & Lianne Bacon.
Music: Featuring extracts from: ‘Lucas’ & ‘Goodbye’ by Johnny Ripper | ‘Teachers Pet’ by Erex Henya
and ‘Read is Dead’ by Alban Lepsy
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

 Podcast 45PODCAST 45: This month we feature a collection of short comedy, drama and poetry that we’ve recently produced but haven’t yet broadcast on the podcast. Featuring ‘Wild Bill Hickok’ at the Job-Centre, a different form of internet piracy, poems from the ‘Rother Valley poetry collective’ and a new radio play in which a young woman discovers that sometimes having the right answer doesn’t always lead to the correct choice.

 

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Presented By: Julia Harrigan
Performed By: Tymothy Lindsay, Nik Larson, Zachary Ryan, Gav Roberts, Charlotte Ansell, Renate Reynolds, Joe Lister-Streep, Christine Bellamy, Sangita Basudev, Lianne Bacon, Christopher Bellamy, Laurence Peacock, Matt Mcateer and Dylan Carrat
Credits: Written by Chris Bellamy, Peter Beeston, Mal Carrat, Gav Roberts and Charlotte Ansell
Edited & Produced by Peter Beeston

Music: Meander by Podington Bear | ‘On the Tree Line’ by ‘Old-Dog’
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

podcast44

PODCAST 44: Jenny is standing in her bedroom, cleaning a pair of walking boots. She is in her under-slip. There is a mirror, a small table, a rail of clothing and a double bed. A long nighty is on top of the bed and underneath it, sits a small cardboard box. She patiently waits for her husband to return, while outside the rain continues to fall, as it has done all day…

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Performed By: Elaine Parker and Michael Thompson
Credits: Written by Alice Collins | Edited & Produced by Peter Beeston
Music: “Quiet Rain” by Onlymeith
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Cornucopia Podcast 43

PODCAST 43: In the winter of 2007 under conditions of utmost secrecy. BBC managers created a now mothballed sister station for Radio4. Supposed to be a bolder and less middle-class approach to talk radio. It all went terribly wrong and the vast range of commissioned shows has never been heard by the pubic to this day. Until now…

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Performed By: David Ault, Laurence Peacock, Ian Carter, Chris Bellamy, Phil Mason, Christine Bellamy, Canan Cahit, Alice Collins and Peter Willington.
Credits: Written by Laurence Peacock | Edited & Produced by Peter Beeston
Music: “Kakadu Variations” by Beethoven from ‘Hyperion Records’, Extracts from the album “Blackbird” by Justin Bianco, The National Anthem of the USSR by Alexander Alexandrov & Folli the Foal by Andrew Fenner
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Cornucopia Radio Podcast 42PODCAST 42: Dave thought it seemed like a good idea at the time; an invigorating hiking trek across the peak district with his best friend Kevin. It would help take his mind off all the relationship, family and work problems which had seemingly overwhelmed him of late. But unfortunately, the trip which awaited him would only contain injuries, secrets, lies, ramen-style instant snack foods and incredibly clumsy metaphors….

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Performed By: Phil Mason, Jonathan Syer and Paticus Roth.
Credits: Written by Nick Card | Edited & Produced by Peter Beeston
Music: ‘Waltzing in Dreamland’ – Alan Moorhouse & ‘Ukulele Vs Kazoo & Whistle Too’ by ‘Mind Map That
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast LogoPODCAST 41: Adam and Suzanne are in love, but a question about their sexual past leads to jealousy and mistrust, which they must somehow overcome if the relationship is to survive. However the specter of Thatcherism casts a long shadow across the decades, highlighting the class divide between the couple, as they both have to come to terms with their own expectations from life, and each other…

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Performed By: Debbie Attwell, Justin Scott, Matt McAteer, Nic Bowden, Peter Beeston & Linda Johnson
Credits: Written by Justin Scott | Edited & Produced by Peter Beeston
Music Tracks: Song of A Banker’ and ‘Zero 2 Hero’ by Javolenus
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 40: Sarah sits in the empty white room, staring blankly at the wall. She doesn’t know why she is here and she doesn’t know what they want. All she does know, is that out there; somewhere, her family is waiting and that she will do anything to find a way back to them. She will do whatever it takes…

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Performed By: David Ault & Karen Hayman
Credits: Written by Nic Bowden | Edited & Produced by Peter Beeston
Music Tracks: Sandman by Leonard J.Paul and Quiet Hours by Onlymeith
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAT 39: Our story takes place the night before Christmas, outside the magical and wondrous structure that is Santa’s Workshop. It is a scene of busy preparation and anticipation, as a year’s worth of hard work finally comes to fruition! So as Santa’s little helpers run around checking every final detail, and Santa himself suits up for a night of delivering presents to children across the world; the Reindeer find themselves preparing for the trip ahead in their own special way…

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Performed By: Nic Bowden, Dan Khan, Joe Lister-Streep, Rob Atkinson, Ian Carter.
Credits: Written by Phil Mason & Renate Reynolds. Produced and Edited by Peter Beeston.
Music Taken From: Santastic: Holiday Boots
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 38: When her son Tony, a comprehensive school Teacher, is sent to prison for abusing one of his 14 year old female pupils, his mother Christine is plunged into a nightmare. Set against the backdrop of her visits and letters post sentence, her confusion soon turns to anger as she is forced to examine her true feelings for her only child as his denial and minimization brings with it a realisation that their relationship must change if it is to survive the sentence and beyond….

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Performed By: Caroline Cooper, Jonathan Syer & Ian Carter
Credits: Written by Paul Kenny. Sound Engineering by Robin Downe.  Edited & Produced by Peter Beeston
Music Tracks: I Cried by Davide Raia, Rainy Day by Alexander Franke, Sappho by Javolenus, Thank You by Javolenus, Bm100 by Javolenus, The Pond by Opus Opium and Mellow Acoustic by Javolenus
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 37: Once again we return to the world of podcasting with three new short productions that all deal with that thing we lovingly call ‘life’. We start by exploring the highs and lows (plus the nail polish) of a local temping agency. We then jump back 70 years and listen to a surprisingly prophetic women hiding within the London underground during the blitz. Finally, we’re introduced to Kaz and Donna; two young women who have nothing but their makeup, Ugg-Boots and bus tickets to help them make it through the day.

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Credits: Written By David Kirkham. Produced and Edited by Peter Beeston
Performed By: David Kirkham, Sinead Rankin, Jasmine Warwick, Canan Cahit & Renate Reynolds
Music Tracks:1.Make by Bit Basic, 2. Your Shit is on My Milk by That Crooner from Nowhere
3. Life Unfolds by Derek Clegg 4. Drorkqs by Proswell
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 36: Declan Deck has invented something which he feels will change the very nature of what we consider standing and what we consider sitting. He calls it an easy-to-erect-and-collapse-one-size-fits-all-canvas-covered-chair (although he’s flexible on future name changes). He thinks that perhaps a soon-to-be-launched, metal-clad, yet unsinkable boat (featuring four funnels, five decks & one lifeboat), will be the perfect place to demonstrate his new sessio-esque device. But somewhere, out in the Mid-Atlantic, sits a lonely and tone-deaf iceberg who has a very different idea…

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Credits: Written and Produced by Chris Bellamy. Edited by Peter Beeston.
Performed By:  Stan Skinny, Phil Mason, Owen York, Ciara Kelly, Chris Bellamy, Howard Russell
and Robert Cossyleon as the ‘Iceberg’
Music Tracks: Featuring a short extract from ‘Heatwave’ by Irving Berlin used under a fair use agrement.
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 35: Moments can occur when you least expect them, existing for only the briefest of instances; often leaving you wondering if such an experience could ever happen again. They might find you alone, happy, excited or regretful. But remember, they will find you…

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Credits: Written and Produced by Janice Sampson. Edited by Peter Beeston.
Performed By: Jennifer Derbyshire, David Chafer and Janice Sampson
Music Tracks: Featuring short extracts from ‘Big Spender by Shirley Bassey’ & ‘Magic Moments by Bing Crosby’, used under a fair use agrement.
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 34: In this months podcast we’ll check out the latest breakthrough in artificial intelligence, have a go at restarting the cold war, see if pressing a button could really get you a cool million dollars and finally, we’ll ask what would have happened if Juliet had settled down and married Romeo.

It’s all here on the “Cornucopia Radio Show Podcast” The Home of Imagination!

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Charles Gosden
Performed By: Phil Mason, Tom Schalk, Nick Card, David Kirkham, Robert Ferguson,  Louis J Rhone, Steve Goric & Emma Cuckson.
Music Tracks:1.El Reloj by Jovenes y Sexys, 2.Kitchen Morning by Birds are Indie
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 33: How simple is it to leave behind a place that you know so well? A place that you built with your own two hands? Even if everyone else had already given up & moved on; could you still allow yourself to walk away & forget it was ever there?  Could you start again from scratch somewhere new? Of course, you know that if you stayed you’d be alone. But at the same time, if you left; who would know this place was ever here to begin with…?

For Tom, that place was ‘Myspace’ and deep down, he knew he’d never leave…

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Credits: Written and Edited by Peter Beeston.
Starring: Luana McTiernan as Beth & Kevin M. Connolly as Tom
Music: Featuring the track, ‘Private Reflection’ by Kevin MacLeod & ‘Dorian Grey’ by Anthony Kozar
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 32: Outsiders might see the magic forest as an enchanted place; full of amazement and wonder. But for the people that have to walk these cobbles? Well, they see it all a bit differently. They know all to well that you don’t have to scratch very far to discover the criminal scum lurking behind every toadstool. So here we find ourselves; outside a little wooden cabin, deep within the magic forest. As unbeknownst to them, two law enforcement officers are about to crack the case of their lives…

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Credits: Written by Charles Gosden. Produced and Edited by Peter Beeston.
Staring: Christopher Bellamy, Ian Carter, Renate Reynolds, Philomena MacLean, Phil Mason, Jason Turner, Emma Cuckson, Becky Virgo, Rob Atkinson, Nick Draper, Peter Beeston, Nick Card, Rex Davis
Also thanks to Graphixgoddess & Covenantc at Fiverr.com
Music: Featuring the track, ‘Sunrise’ by Alastair Cameron
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 31: We all knew the commander wanted medals. But us? All we wanted was to be in our homes, in front of the telly. We knew he wanted recognition, but was it really worth another pointless Argentine death on your hands? Back home, if one teenager is killed it’ll probably make the headlines. Over here; for us? It’s just another day at the office. How much blood has to be spilled before this thing ends?

PLEASE NOTE: Although this story is based on a real event. It has been heavily fictionalised and should not be judged as historically accurate.

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Credits: Written by Gareth Smith. Produced and edited by Peter Beeston.
Performed By: Graham Burgess, Howard Russell, Michael Davies, David Swaine, Peter Beeston, Phil Mason, Rob Atkinson & Kathryn Stanbra.
Music: Featuring Mystery, Suspicion and Treason by Celestial Aeon Project.
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 30: After vandalising a local bowling green; Michael, a young troubled teen is forced to help repair the damage he’s done. As he learns the implications of his actions, he finds himself taken under the wing of Ted; who wants to help Michael get his life back on track.

But life; like the game of bowls, isn’t as simple as it first seems…

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Credits: Written by Paul Kenny. Produced and edited by Peter Beeston. Performed By: Robert Atkinson, Matthew Scott, Howard Russell, Christine Bellamy and Deborah Bartlett.
Music: Featuring, ‘Dont Close Your Eyes’, ‘Ships’ & ‘I’m Letting Go’ by Josh Woodward
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 29: I suppose it was inevitable, me ending up here in this police cell. You might even say it was my destiny. You see ever since I was small, I’ve loved stories of heroes and magicians who’ve escaped from impossible places and incredible situations. Now here I am, inside such a place. It’s a bit ironic I guess. However; sometimes what you see isn’t necessarily what you see…

‘Thanks to Harry’ is a new production written by Phil Ryan from Storm-Productions and produced by the creative team here at ‘Cornucopia Radio’. It tells the tale of someone who uses his skills as a magician to help create a better life for himself, his friends and the woman he loves.

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Credits: Written by Phil Ryan. Produced and edited by Peter Beeston.
Performed By: Ian Carter, Graham Rodgers, Christopher Bellamy, Bev Mason, Anastasios Filactou, Vivienne Pettitt, Peter Beeston, Nick Card, Paul Kenny, Nick Draper and Owen York.
Music By: Johnny Ripper from the album ‘Soundtrack For a Film That Doesn’t Exist’
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 28: If you’re reading this; then we’d like to give you a little bit of advice. You should really download this podcast! Yes granted, we’re not that impartial, especially considering as it’s our own product. But where else are you going to find a comedy sketch podcast featuring: interplanetary warfare, philosophy funk parties, Antarctic treks, the damaged mind of Godzilla, time paradoxes and an exclusive relaxation mixtape by Michael Bay? Don’t bother answering by the way, as we’re being rhetorical. You’re not going to find it anywhere but here!!.

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Phil Mason, Graham Marshall and Charles Gosden. Performed By: Ian Carter, Graham Marshall, Shawn Carlsson, Robert Perkins, Nick Card, Owen York, Joe-Lister Yates, Peter Beeston, Nick Draper, Vivienne Pettitt, Kage-Ichihashi, Phil Elmore, Astrid C and Michael Thompson.
Music Tracks:1.]Mr Fancy Pants by Jonathan Coulton, 2.] Your Love is by Paul and Storm]
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 27: Some might have thought these stories lost for an eternity, but we’ve found them! So we’re proud to present, a new selection of some of the most unusual and amazing adventures to befall our favourite pipe smoking detective: ‘Sherlock Holmes’. Written and performed by the ever insightful Christopher Bellamy.

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Credits: Written and Performed by Christopher Bellamy
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 26: ‘Fractured Lives’ explores how the First World War literally fractured lives. The war’s many casualties were not just amongst the dead. There were the men maimed and disabled with scars that would blight the rest of their lives. The play also has resonance for the present day, as wars and international conflicts continue to fracture lives, leaving scars and injuries that can last a lifetime. Today men still return from war’s ‘theatre’ to play out new roles that they have not chosen. Fractured Lives’ was inspired by Painted Fabrics Ltd, a pioneering company for disabled servicemen, which produced high quality painted textiles, in Sheffield between 1915 –1959.

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Credits: Written by Alice Collins. Directed and Edited by Peter Beeston.
Performed By: Kevin Cordell, Gill Buttery, Phil Eardly, Dave Ridley, Alison Fell, Kai Roland, Patrick Black, Tim Jones, Alice Collins, Ian Carter, Rob Atkinson, Jonathan Syer, Phil Mason
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 25: Have you ever felt the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, the chills going up your spine until you feel like you have to shake this feeling off your back? No matter how silly it feels? Or how about those times when you feel like someone is looking over your shoulder? So much so, that you can almost feel someone breathing down your neck? Listening to this podcast, as you are right now; alone in a darkened room, the disturbing feelings become stronger than ever and so intense that you feel the need to keep looking behind you; just to reassure yourself that you’re still alone.

And that’s when it will strike…

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. The story “Dracula” was taken from the Woody Allen book “Getting Even” and was adapted for the podcast.
Performed By: Jonathan Syer, Rob Atkinson, Duncan Miller, Christopher Bellamy, Rex Davies, Wendy Davies, Renate Reynolds, Chris Drury, Sangita Basudev and Phil Mason.
Music Tracks:Night Of A Thousand Orgasms – Genre Lectric
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 24: Steven Hutchinson was on his way to meet an old friend; somebody from his past for whom a dark secret had once been hidden. Yet, as he crossed the road and approached the location they’d arranged to meet, he found himself trying to comprehend a myriad of emotions and questions he wasn’t sure he ever wanted the answer to. He never saw the car that hit him that day. The car that killed him… ‘A Grave Reunion’ is the new Poetry-Play, telling the story of four friends coming back together after ten years to morn the passing of somebody from their past. Somebody who is important to all of them…

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Credits: Written, Directed and Edited by Nick Card.
Cast: Lisa Jane Pennington,Nick Kilby,Lucy Porter, Tom Walker
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 23: Who is faster than a speeding stock market crash, more powerful than a government bailout, and able to leap tall unemployment figures in a single bound? Yes! It’s ‘Commander Awesome & Liberty Lad’ and in times of severe fiduciary strife; they are the only superhero duo you will ever need (especially if you’re also a keen purchaser of high quality ex-superhero items on ebay)

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Credits: Written by Phil Mason. Directed and Edited by Peter Beeston.
Performed by: Nic Bowden, Phil Mason, Renate Reynolds, Jonathan Syer, Joe-Lister Yates, Graham Rodgers
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 22: Martians Never Die” is the next in our series of updated radio sci-fi pieces from the forties and fifties. Re-recorded with new actors, modern sound effects and atmospheric music.

What is the ideal bodyguard? The most ferocious looking? The most efficient killer? Or the most devoted? On Earth, you might find a combination of all three, but it’d never be as effective as the curious creature which came back from Mars with Dr. Clyde Curtis; the first human to ever step foot on the red planet…

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Credits: Written by Lucius Daniel. Directed and Edited by Peter Beeston.
Performed by:
Tim Rutherford, Christine Bellamy, Ian Carter, Stephen Bullivant, Peter Beeston, Claire Hodgson Music by: Matt Seldon
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 21: It was a long, late night and Julie finds herself being woken up from a dreamworld by Karen, her best friend since childhood. Together, on this bright morning they will discuss many things, including their past, present and future and maybe they’ll find out why Julie left the front door unlocked…

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Credits: Written by Peter Wilson & Peter Beeson Directed and Edited by Peter Beeston.
Performed by:
Claire Hodgson & Renate Reynolds
Music:
An Angel, Ameliorate: by Falling You & Mystery: by The Headroom Project

This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 20: Digging Deep’ tells the story of a community and a friendship that struggled to survive during the 1984-85 UK ‘Miner’s Strike’. Two people coming together for the first time in 25 years. Remembering the decisions that they had to make and the consequences that were bound to follow…

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Credits: Written & Produced by Alice Collins. Directed & Edited by Peter Beeston.
Performed by:
Alison Fell, Gill Buttery & Dave Ridley
Music Tracks:
Blackbird/Daybreak/Still By Justin Bianco. All tracks licensed from magnatune
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 19: It’s the start of a new year, but that isn’t going to stop us! In fact nothing is going to stop us now! As we produce yet another haphazardly constructed and poorly thought out comedy podcast! This month featuring: snowmen, cardboard people, insurance companies, the titanic, ducks & dogs & cows, inserted radios, sex shops and trainee airline pilots.

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Phil Mason, Andrew Calow, Roderick Shearer. Extra material from “Cruel Shoes” by Steve Martin.
Performed By: Michael Thompson, Peter Drobinski, Renate Reynolds, Chris Drury, Rex Davies, Alan Robinson, Phil Mason, Andrew Calow, Nick Draper, Roy Powell, Colin Empson, Nick Card, Jason Turner, Chris Lloyd, Peter Beeston & Sangita Basudev.
Music Tracks: 1.]Sleep is on the Way by Arthur Yoria, 2.] Don’t Do Me No Harm by Beight 3.] The Nights Are Getting Longer by The Union Trade All tracks licensed from magnatune.com
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

hitting the wallPODCAST 18: It is said that Pheidippides, an Athenian herald, was sent to Sparta to request help when the Persians landed at Marathon, running 150 miles in just two days. After this, he then ran another 25 miles from the battlefield near the town of Marathon to Athens to announce the Greek victory over Persia in the Battle of Marathon with the word “Νενικήκαμεν”, meaning ‘We have won’. He then collapsed and died on the spot due to exhaustion.

Many years later; in the town of Sheffield, we find ourselves focused on the adventures of a very unfit man trying to complete his first ever Marathon. He’s only just started and already he’s thinking about catching a bus…

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Credits: Written and Directed Peter Beeston.
Performed By:
Ian Carter, Paul Brunt, Sangita Basudev, Chris Lloyd, David Reaney, Sara Robinson Musical Tracks: Prismatone, By Poddington Bear
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast 17 ImagePODCAST 17: The meaning of ‘Three’ is all about the union of two parts to create a unique whole. That point of union forms the fruit of knowledge; it is our access point to unlimited potential. Because if ‘One’ represents force, and ‘Two’ represents an opening, then ‘Three’ is the birthing of true wisdom through a forced opening.

So, let us ‘force your opening’ with the “Free by Three” special. Starting with “Falling”, a tale about the denial of gravity. Then later on you’ll hear us helping the public with “The Poetry Technical Support Line” and lastly, we’ll tell you about an object which everybody truly desires. We call it, “The Macguffin”

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Credits: Written and Directed Peter Beeston.
Performed By: Tim Rutherford, Iain Chandler, Dina Lees, Clea Langton
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

16picturePODCAST 16: We’ll start with long slow phone-call before we move onto an empty restaurant, there’s a guinea pig… in a bowl of soup….yeah that’s right…soup! Then we’ll wait, we’ll let you try to take in what you’ve just heard. Then boom! You’re in deep space, didn’t see that one coming; did you? We’ll knock you down on the ground with a quick one-two! Dog sedatives and Junking the Junk. You won’t know what hit you. Finally, you’ll think it’s all over, after all why wouldn’t it be? But you’re wrong, ’cause you’ve forgotten about a little trip to the dentist, haven’t you? Oh, you didn’t forget about it? Sorry our mistake.

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Phil Mason, Jeff Goebel, and Andrew Calow
Performed By:
Laura Rae, Roy Powell, Andrew Martin, Stephen Bullivant, Andrew Hopton, Alan Robinson, Peter Beeston, Phil Mason, Rex Davies, Wendy Davies, Chris Cockburn, Colin Empson, Nick Card & Paul Brunt. Musical Tracks: Ergo Phizmiz performing Rolands Vegners & Nora Keyes performing Prisoner
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Podcast 15PODCAST 15: Three important characters stand on a windy hilltop. One is known as Rock, the strongest and bravest of the group. Another calls herself Scissors; she is as sharp as she is deadly. Finally, struggling to avoid being blown away in the wind, we find Paper. He is flat. He is nothing else. Elsewhere a string puppet is entering a brothel for the first time in his life. He wants to bang wood (without getting a splinter!). Meanwhile, a TV plays to itself in a shop window. The show Backpeddle is just starting; yet again somebody will have to atone for crimes levelled against it by the British press. Across the road, Pam is opening up her pet shop for another day. As she does, she views a pantomime horse crossing the road; she wonders where he is going in such a rush. The Pantomime horse is going for a job interview; he knows the job is already his. Do all these events have anything in common? Well, they might….

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Nick Card, Phil Mason and Andrew Martin. Performed By: Peter Beeston, Nick Card, Phil Mason, Gillian Langley, Andrew Martin, George Webster, Rex Davies, Wendy Davies, Barry Fisher, Stephen Bullivant, Kerry Marriott. End Musical Track: Singing Sadie – Everyone In Town Wants You Dead
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Podcast 14PODCAST 14: ‘Fishing’ tells the story of a son’s last ditch attempts at connection and reconciliation with his dying father Frank; who as the cancer takes over his body, is becoming increasingly bitter and frustrated at the prospect of losing control over what little time he has left. In the hospice, he dreams of one last “adventure” of his own, a return to one of his favourite fishing spots to ‘hit’ a Tench or two and sink a Pint of Kington’s at ‘The Royal’.

Realising that time is of the essence, Phil ‘kidnaps’ his Father from the clutches of ward sister “Eva Braun” and on a hired narrow-boat and borrowed time, the two men embark on a journey of discovery revolving around the only activity they ever shared – Fishing. As they make their journey along the rivers and canals, the two men learn some painful home truths as long held secrets and opinions rise to the surface and with time running out, Phil is forced to reassess his commitment to the trip and ultimately his Father. Can he make it to the bitter end or will his selfish, middle class sensibilities betray them both?

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Credits: Written By Paul Kenny. Directed by Peter Beeston.
Performed By:
David Reid, Christopher Bellamy, Kerry Marriott, Lynn Rishworth, Wnedy Davies, Sangita Davies, Sangita Basudev, Rex Davies, Nick Card, Jason Turner, Becky Virgo
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast 13PODCAST 13: I was trying to think the other day, about how old I might have been when I first heard about it. It’s odd, a memory like that you’d imagine would be seared into my very brain, but no. I’d guess, I was maybe seven or eight. I do recall a friend saying his uncle had bought one and he’d seen it himself. Of course, all kids lie and looking back now; I suspect at that age he wouldn’t have actually recognised one if it was stood next to him. However, later in life as you enter your teens, you begin to question things more. You want to know the ‘why‘ as much as the ‘how‘. I remember it seeming odd that everybody talked about this thing, yet nobody could tell me what it looked like. People were always vague when they talked about it. Never really making it clear if they did actually own it, or had once had it, or secretly longed for it. But it quickly became obvious to me, that if anybody did have it, they were keeping it very secret.

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Jason Turner, Phil Mason and Graham Marshall. Performed By: Peter Beeston, Nick Card, Jason Tuner, Phil Mason, Chris Drury & David Cox. Musical Interludes by: Cassetteboy
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Podcast 12PODCAST 12: You stand in front of the door. You hand held in mid-air, posed to knock upon the harsh wooden surface. But you don’t. You barely move at all. Instead, you let the gentle summer breeze wash over you. You’re scared! Scared of entering “The House”

“The House” is a new concept poetry play. Previously produced by the ‘Cornucopia Team’ as an album release for ‘Amnesty International’ and now available as an exclusive podcast.

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Nick Card.
Performed By:
Nick Card, Geoffrey Card, David Zezulka & Jess Falk.

This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast 10PODCAST 10: Fermat’s last theorem said if an integer n is greater than 2, then the equation a + b = c has no solutions in non-zero integers a, b, and c. Which is just silly when you think about it. Instead, listen to this; we’ve got Banksy, Ronnie Corbett, Anthony Worrall Thompson, spam emails, M.C Escher, and a history of medicine. We’ve got it all…

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Jason Turner and Random Acts
Performed By: Peter Beeston, Andrew Costa, Nick Card, Jason Tuner, Nick Drapper, Rodrick Shearer and Random Acts. Tracks: Sunspots and Halflife come from Poddington Bear under a creative commons license. Final Track: I’m Happy by Ivor Cutler
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast 9PODCAST 9: Santa is having a rather bad 2008. First of all, he’s had all the money in his landsbanki bank account suspended, quickly followed by the discovery of a series of offensive messages left on his answerphone from two out of control BBC DJ’s. Elsewhere, a selection of unemployed high street bankers are having to go out carol singing to make some money this Christmas, but pretty soon a better idea presents itself…

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston.
Performed By: Peter Beeston, Gavin Hodge, Andrew Costa, Nick Draper, Philip Mason, Simon Green, Lucy Meldrum and Sangita Basudev
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

PODCAST 8: Beleaguered controversial northern post-industrial amnesiac dot.communist entrepreneur Ray Christmas resides herbaholically in just one of his edge-of-the-city mansions where, holed up with his unwitting personal pharmacist, cinematographer and biographer, the two manage to leverage his global majority shareholding in the totally fixed and failing Baby-bond futures market by selling the crudely written, filmed and directed feline soap opera – “The Archie & Cilla Show” – to an overindulgent media conglomerate.

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Credits: Written by Rex Davies. Directed By Peter Beeston
Performed By: Matt MacAteer, Robert Beard, David Reid, Rex Davies, Wendy Davies, Peter Beeston, Philo Holland, Andrew Costa, Greg Harris, Geoffrey Card, David Zezulka, Val Monti, Nick Card, Ian Brome, Richard Crowther.
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast 7PODCAST 7: In a very special edition of the cornucopia podcast, we present some short spooky stories and poems, written and performed by the cast. “Blood and Tears” features a typewriter with a thirst for blood and “Everything will be Okay” tells a story about the fall of humanity and a flesh eating virus. We’ll also challenge you to listen to Gloomy Sunday without taking a long sleep that can last a lifetime.

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material by Chris Drury.
Performed By: Chris Drury, Nikki Shanahan, Andrew Costa, Sangita Basudev, Rex Davies
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast 6PODCAST 6: Stop, look and listen. Once you’ve done that, start out by checking out our credit crunch report or some startling courtroom dramas. Then settle down for a little “Chicken and Fox” action, followed by the “News at Zen”. Please note; Ronnie Corbett has been banned from the studio. Look it clear we’re going nowhere. So you better get used to us!!

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Jason Turner, Nick Card and Graham Marshall. Performed By: Peter Beeston, Andrew Costa, Nick Card, Jason Tuner, Greg Harris, Wendy Davis, Joanne Mateer
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast 5PODCAST 5: The door to this podcast is always open, mainly due to mechanical failure. So look inside for fighting fonts, Yorkshire clichés, a guide to stalking, answer-phone messages and funky philosophy. Are you even reading this??.

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Arron Weedal, Matthew McAteer and Duncan Miller. Performed By: Peter Beeston, Andrew Costa, Nick Card, Arron Weedal, Matthew McAteer, Jason Tuner, Kerry Marriott and Duncan Miller.
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast 4PODCAST 4: This podcast will fit you like a suit of armour. It’s perfect, it works; don’t change a thing! You’ll start with a full introduction to the “Police Academy” before taking a very quick visit to Mars (take a jacket, it’ll be chilly). Once you return, will have a look at your horoscope, before trying on some “Cruel Shoes”. To end your day, we’ll all take a quick spin in the “Large Hedron Collider” Look, I’m not meant to be telling you this, but you’ve only got 31 minutes to live. So, you better download this…

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Rodrick Shearer. “She Had The Jugs”, “Introduction” and “The Morning I Got Out of Bed”, all written by Steve Martin, who is brilliant…. Performed By: Peter Beeston, Andrew Costa, Nick Card, Graham Rodgers, Deborah Egan, Rodrick Shearer, Nikki Shanahan and Joanne Mateer. Music Played: “Amarok Theme, by Hochglanz” and “Wild and Cool, by Murat Ses”
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast 3PODCAST 3: To create the following podcast, you will need: The city of Rome, a tank full of petrol, some dog liver, a busy art gallery, plus some kind of pocket computer. Make sure you mix with “Great Gusto” and then leave out in the sun until it becomes a public nuisance.

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Nick Card and Jason Turner. Performed By: Peter Beeston, Andrew Costa, Jason Turner, Nick Card, Graham Rodgers, Deborah Egan, Rodrick Shearer and Wendy Davies.
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast 2PODCAST 2: Listen on your ipod, listen on your computer. Listen while enjoying the sunshine. Listen while jogging. Listen while having a drink. Listen while poking a badger with a stick. Listen, listen, listen! This week we have: Armies, Sherlock Holmes, Office Zombies, Ronnie Corbett, Moon Landings, and eyeball gouging. If you like it; try and tell 6 people about the podcast, then get them to tell six other people and so on and so on. By law if we do this enough, Kevin Bacon will end up listening….

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Random Acts, Jason Turner and Andrew Costa. Performed By: Peter Beeston, Andrew Costa, Jason Turner, Andrew Hopton, Nick Card and Random Acts
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported license

Podcast 1PODCAST 1: Welcome to the first podcast; in this compressed but concise package: You’ll find out why the internet was invented, discover how to put together flat pack furniture, listen to the colour blue, learn to cook with Mr ‘Worrall Thompson’ and you might even manage to catch 40 winks near the end. It’s like drain cleaner, BUT FOR YOUR HEAD!!!

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Credits: Produced, Written and Edited by Peter Beeston. Additional material written by Andrew Costa and Jason Turner. Desire/An Invitation to the Dance, written and created by Liz Price. Winter and The Sound Of Nothing by Sara Ayers played under the Creative Commons License. Performed By: Peter Beeston, Andrew Costa, Jason Turner, David Cox, Deborah Egan, Andrew Hopton, Nick Draper.
This work is released under a Attribution-NonCommercial

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